Journey Into Your Rainforest Mind: A Field Guide for Gifted Adults and Teens, Book Lovers, Overthinkers, Geeks, Sensitives, Brainiacs, Intuitives, Procrastinators, and Perfectionists by Paula Prober

Author:Paula Prober [Prober, Paula]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Psychology, Self Help
ISBN: 9781643881041
Amazon: 1643881043
Goodreads: 50732212
Publisher: Luminare Press, LLC
Published: 2019-06-18T00:00:00+00:00

PERFECTIONISM’S TWIN SISTER

Continuing on our trek through the jungle—your wild, fertile, and colorful rainforest mind.

I want to get to the good kind of perfectionism. Yes, there is a healthy perfectionism. It can still drive you and your coworkers, friends, and relatives crazy. It can still stop you from starting a project or from finishing, but it’s not something to discard, destroy, or disregard. It’s an inherent part of your nature. You were born with this.

Simply stated: You strive for beauty, balance, har-mony, justice, and precision in all things. (Well, maybe not all things. Maybe it doesn’t apply to your garage.) Am I right?

I might add that this means you have extremely high standards and expectations for yourself. I say this with confidence because I have seen this intrinsic perfectionism in practically every rainforest-minded person I have ever known. I have been hanging out with them since the mid-seventies. That’s a long time. That’s a lot of people.

Are you often obsessed with an idea? Driven? Researching incessantly? Do you keep raising the bar when you reach a goal? When you were a child, did you fail to turn in assignments when they didn’t meet your standards even when you knew you’d get an A?

See? What did I tell you?

What about this: When you see perfection in an ocean sunset or in a star-filled night sky, when you hear perfection in the music that you adore, when you taste perfection at that restaurant in Paris, does it take your breath away? When you find the exact word for the story, or when all the elements of your experiment line up just right, or when the poetry of the mathematical equation sings to you, is there a sense of satisfaction that is deep and unmistakable?

Yes? Good. Here’s the problem: Other people don’t get it.

It looks neurotic, dysfunctional, excessive, and OCD to them. Maybe to you, too. It’s not, but it can get you kicked out of graduate school because you don’t hand in your poems on time. It can mean that your col-leagues don’t invite you to join them at happy hour. It can mean that your taxes are four years overdue.

Did I mention that this might be a problem? How do you keep your vision, your idealism, your capac-ity for creating mental, emotional, spiritual, or actual cathedrals and still do your taxes, maintain friendships, or stay in school?

First, recognize that intrinsic perfectionism is part of who you are, and it means that with you, beauty happens. Quality is expected and produced, and this is a good thing.

Second, look for other rainforest-minded folks, and appreciate their high standards. Invite them out for happy hour. Get feedback on your work from people with similar expectations and abilities so that you respect and believe what they’re telling you.

Finally, prioritize. Find the projects and activities that don’t need to be exquisite or comprehensive or ridiculously awe-inspiring. Excellence can be enough. Good enough can be enough, on occasion, for the less important things. I mean it.

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